Horoscope mismatch

[myfs_103296]

Dear Cecil,

Your website has been very educational and I am heartened especially after reading your advice to queries that you have indeed uphold the integrity and professionalism of your profession!Your practicaland down to earth advice posted on the web is very encouraging thus prompting me to sign up as a member (although i had previously been sceptical abt such memberships).

After looking thru the topics, I tried out the Horoscope portion; checking the compatibility chart, I found that my boyfriend and my horoscope falls under "Very difficult". He is a water ox and I'm a wood tiger. We have had a 'rollercoaster' kind of r'ship so far and I have always contributed this to the fact that our charactersbeing very different.

Is there anyway to mitigate these 'inherent' differences?

We have intention to settle down andhad bought a apartment property in July last yr -Grandeur 8with a SW facing. With our horoscope and thus elements being so different, I find it difficult to recoincile these to the layout of the apartment. Since this is already purchased, I'm wondering if it is at all possible, to apply the laws offengshuion the property soto help us smoothen and strengthen our relationship.

Appreciate youradvice! Many thanks in advance.

Chloe

[Cecil Lee]

Dear Chole,

Please see below:-

Quote

On 5/12/2004 6:29:15 AM, Anonymous wrote:

Dear Cecil,

Your website has been very

educational and I am heartened

especially after reading your

advice to queries that you

have indeed uphold the

integrity and professionalism

of your profession!Your

practicaland down to

earth advice posted on the web

is very encouraging thus

prompting me to sign up as a

member (although i had

previously been sceptical abt

such memberships).

I am glad that you find the information, here useful.

As for memberships, actually, the rationale why one has to "sign-into" a forum to participate or use the reports is frankly, not so much of being in a membership, but rather, this is because, creating an account (thus, equating to being a member) means that personal profiles can be created and used by "members".

It is because of the ease for users to e.g. personalise the forum e.g. mark - read - messages; mark conferences, or participate via e-mail messages.

Quote

After looking thru the topics,

I tried out the Horoscope

portion; checking the

compatibility chart, I found

that my boyfriend and my

horoscope falls under "Very

difficult". He is a

water ox and I'm a wood tiger.

We have had a 'rollercoaster'

kind of r'ship so far and I

have always contributed this

to the fact that our

charactersbeing very

different.

Is there anyway to mitigate

these 'inherent' differences?

Frankly, I can only say this " You are not alone, here".

Last year, I posted a message in this forum about two couples:

Many of us have distinct characters and "worse-of-all" when we do get married, we are or seemed to be placed into a "jungle" or a concrete jungle e.g. a new home to survive in.

This couple related to me that because of different up-bringing; for example, simple things like he (husband) squeezing the toothpaste and not neatly tugging the back port - ultimately created a "trigger" for quarrels.

Thus, many of us are brought up differently and like the banks or banking, once we are of a certain age, our characters are already formed - difficult to change (or change immediately!) This is why banks allow signatures instead of thumb prints say after a specific age.

In fact, many people start of a relationship - with some kind of "attraction" to the other party. Some may view beauty, while others seems to like the opposite(s) or opposites attract.

But, often, once this "fantasy" or phase 1 is over, many of us begin to realise that our "partner" or would be partner is so totally different. And most of the time, seemingly, simple things or a collection of "irritation" gathers momentum and results in outbursts or anger with each other.

Actually, this is quite normal. Quite normal if verbal "abuse" is used. But never physical "destruction" e.g. hitting each other etc... Therefore, if it is verbal abuse (or scolding), then perhaps, we should often, try to during this stage not to further inflame the situation.

I understand this is very hard but, take it that is part and parcel of a relationship where two individuals are placed into a "jungle".

Frankly, contrary to popular believe; in my parent's time and earlier, match-making may seem "unthinkable" now, seems to work especially for my parents.

Here, it is not like now, where we have a freedom to choose. For them, (my parents), they were literally thrown together. And often, perhaps, (NO CHOICE), they seem to have to work it out.

Many couples who often, grow with each other, grow in a way that in later years, many seem to have quite similar character or style.

So, therefore, this is the reason why I say : " You are not alone ".

One have to really work-on-a-relationship to succeed. And imagine if it throughly succeed, you and your partner, would have become a family nucleus - not so much of achieving the government's goal of stop at two but rather, much like what most people hope to go thru i.e. youth, marriage, children, grand children. (Of course "$$$$" and all the other `C's are equally wanting i.e. car, condo - you already have, credit card - sure to have already, hmm cash etc..

Well, by you wanting to make an effort to find out about ways of improving the relationship, means a very positive sign.

Here, I might add that we should not take horoscopes too seriously, as man or individuals can often overcome any adversity. Reading too many of such things e.g. incompatiblity etc.. may lead to auto-suggestion or self-fulfilling prophecy!

Quote

We have intention to settle

down andhad bought a

apartment property in July

last yr -Grandeur

8with a SW facing.

With our horoscope and thus

elements being so different, I

find it difficult to

recoincile these to the layout

of the apartment. Since this

is already purchased, I'm

wondering if it is at all

possible, to apply the laws

offengshuion the

property soto help us

smoothen and strengthen our

relationship.

You have made a right start

One should not be too worried about both being "opposites". This is because, there are many couples out-there who equally are opposites and yet, many survive and prospher.

Even for the Eight House theory, the partner can sleep closer to the intangible force. And, under Flying star Feng Shui, in general SW homes are considered one of the best facing directions under Period 8 (this period flying star Feng Shui).

More importantly, since the way you have written asking on ways to improve on your relationship, implies that you are a very sound and sensible person - and I am very confident that with your maturity, you can easily (depending on the situation) be the guiding light in your relationship.

In fact, to be truly honest, it also depends, many sons always look up to their mum i.e mummy's child etc... Some man perhaps do this...

Best of all, keep the flame going. I believe, many of the best advise given by counsellors are:

1. Always have a listeningear
2. Where possible, seeeach other in better light or see the goodin each otherinstead of only focusing on each other's bad habbits
3. Communication andboth should give in at times.

Warmest Regards,
Cecil

[Cecil Lee]

Oh! I forgot, many men like myself are non-romantics.

Perhaps, it is in-born nature!

So, if this is the case, erh.. again.. You are not alone!

Well take care!

Cecil

[myfs_103296]

DearCecil,

Thanks so much for the prompt reply. Your opinion has been very reassuring. You are right, i supposed for most of us, we tend to look for 'concurrence' even if deep down we already have some 'innate guidelines'. And its great to know that everything is a blessing depending on how we interpret & take it!

Thanks for your confidence; I 'll try to 'overcome' any seeming incompatibilities and strive to see the positive in day-to-day occurences.

Wishing you the best of happiness, health & wealth!

Take care & cheers!

Chloe